I’m in trouble and I need help. My story is quite long. I am pregnant and I have an 8 month old baby.
My first child is with my parents back home and I had this one not long ago and now there’s another one coming. I just found out and am going crazy. We use condom because hormonal birth control gives me so much complications so we stick to condom.
The son of Father Abraham will do the do and if he’s about to cum he then puts the condom on.
The main problem here is; I need someone to come help me but because of my mom in-law my mom cannot come over to help me.
Almost 2 years ago when I got pregnant with my second child, for the sake of peace, I told my husband to let his mom come first for a few months and then later my mom comes to avoid any problems. My husband was not in support coz he said his mom is troublesome and she wouldn’t go back to Ghana when she comes but I insisted because I didn’t want to be called names.
So my mom and my mom in-law went for the visa interview separately and my mom got the visa and my mom in law was refused visa. We didn’t let my mom come because of what my in-law will do if she finds out my mom has come before her. This is a woman who went to insult my parents because my husband came for me and not her first (she said she has suffered taking her son abroad so no one else should enjoy anything from him aside her) .
Even when my husband sends her own kids (his siblings) money and she gets to know about it, she’ll call, insult and rain curses on them. To avoid all this trouble, I didn’t let my mom come though she got the visa. She got 5yrs visa and it has been lying down for almost two years now.
I delivered and suffered alone coz my husband has to go to work after a few days of staying home with me.
Now my baby is still young and my pregnancies are not easy. I am tired I need help but I don’t know what to do. Because if my mom comes…Hmmmmmm…. my in-law will go and perform in my family house.
Even my first daughter who is with my mom she argues everyday that she should be with her so that the upkeep money will come to her meanwhile she is a busy person who won’t have time for my child.
I don’t want her maids too to cater for my child hence she’s with my mom. What do I do?
I am sorry for the ordeals you are facing out there. You need to be strong for yourself this time and also know that your situation is not peculiar to you alone.
Your mother-in-law is obviously a troublesome, quarrelsome, selfish and self-centered woman. And as a matter of fact, she is not going to change now or soon for anybody. The reason is because she is hard-working and have made some money for herself. She also feels she is doing you and your family a favor by raising a good husband for you.
You have to communicate with your husband more about your pains and how much it would help you to have your mom with you. Let him understand that there is no way you can be free with his mom like you will be free with your own mother. Let him know that you love and respect his mom a lot and you wouldn’t want to have any issues with her.
Know that there is nothing you will do that will be good enough for your mother-in-law. She is a difficult, inconsiderate and a hard nut to crack.
While she’s only thinking about her personal interests, you will also consider your personal interest first before anyone else’s.
Raising children entails a lot, you can’t do it alone, especially with the age brackets between your kids. Know that if you are over stressed it will also affect the welfare of your kids and you may break down seriously in no distant time and that will be too much for your husband and the kids to handle. You can also die from stress and then your kids will live at the mercies of another woman.
When Family Decides Your Life’s Partner
So, I will advise you to do your best to get your husband to understand how much you need your mom and not his. His mom can come later when the kids have a grown a bit and your stress is reduced. Put your happiness and peace right for yourself and the kids before you think of pleasing your mom-in-law or anyone else. Also seek advise from your parents on how to go about this whole difficulties. Good Luck!