Story: When Dating a Disabled Person

I am currently dating a physically challenged woman. She has been wheelchair bound since birth and she’s 28. At first, I thought it was going to be easy. I was going to love her and she was going to love me without all the dramas surrounding the relationships between people without disability.

I don’t know what gave me that impression but I was so sure about it. And then things started changing after six months of being together. She gets angry when I don’t respond to her text quickly. When she calls and I don’t pick up the first time, I’m in trouble. When I attend a program and take photos with other ladies, I’m in trouble. She won’t let me take her out and she doesn’t want to go out with other people too.

Recently a girl I know tagged me on Facebook in a photo I took with her at a friend’s wedding. For two weeks, my girlfriend didn’t talk to me. When I call she wouldn’t pick but she’ll rather text me; “God and be with your girlfriends with legs and leave me alone.”

Now I don’t know what to do to make her believe that I truly love her. I’ve tried all the tricks I know but still…. Is there anything I can do to make her believe that I love only her? I’m gradually losing her and I need some help. Please tell me something.

Marriage Chronicles: I must commend your heart for your woman and the effort you have made so far to love her unconditionally.

Read Also:Go For A Good Partner, Not A Perfect Person. 

However, you also had a wrong perception about women and relationship by choosing a disabled lady just to avoid relationship troubles from able-bodied ladies.

You probably didn’t take your time to learn about disabled people and their approach to emotional issues. Disability has psychological implications on its victims. Some could be very aggressive and unimaginably emotional in character. This is as a result of the traumatic stigma and the psychological variation it has on them.

Most disabled person think they are being treated badly because of their conditions. They feel not wanted by all. They mostly suffer low self-esteem. Some suffer depression and mental isolation from perceived rejection by people. It takes only the strong and determined person with disabilities to live normal like every other person.

This is the situation of your woman right now. She wishes she was never in her present health condition. She wishes she can walk about, do everything fellow ladies are doing. She is scared you don’t fancy her enough and you just might end up with other ladies each time you go out and hang around those ladies.

Her personality has been tempered with over the years. She probably didn’t get someone telling her she can do better than able-bodied people out there. Hence, she thinks less of herself.

Also Read:What Do Women Really Want In A Man?  

If you truly love her, then you must be patient with her. Talk more and play more with her. Always let her know she is better than a thousand women out there and you’re not going to betray her trust. Assure her, on daily basis, how much she means to you irrespective of her health situation. Make her your friend and partner.

Start dating her from home before you take her out. Sometimes invite your friends to your house so that she can start getting used to them. It will be easier for you to take her out when you have the support of your close friends.

Always see her as a blessing and not a curse. Overtime she will change the way she thinks and acts. Loving and caring for her will do you good…so be patient with her. God Bless you and Good Luck!

About Wealth Femi

I am Wealth O. A, B.Sc (Chemistry), Delta State University, Nigeria, Diploma (Basic Marine certs), Regional Maritime University, Ghana. Married with kids. Marriage and Relationship Counselor, writer and entrepreneur.

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