When Family Decides Your Life’s Partner


Advice to women try not to end up like me.

I was with a guy some years back. This guy was very good to me, and taught me a lot of things as a woman but he never told me, he had a child. He always felt guilty and always told me he has something to tell me that made me suspect something fishy and tried to get access to his phone, I did my investigation and saw he had a child. I got what I wanted so I told him twas over. He begged me but I refused to accept him back.

I engaged myself in different relationships but I saw all of the men were lacking what the guy I left had so I tried to go back to my ex. I called him to ask whether he was still single and he said yes so I gave him another chance. This guy was an angel from heaven sent to me. He was my happiness since I was born. My parents got to know he had a child and told me to leave him but I pleaded with them that they should lemme be with him. They didn’t like the idea but that was my decision.

All this while my siblings didn’t like him. They always wanted to get something which they will stand on for me to leave this guy. He also saw what my family were planning and always wanted to prove them wrong by treating me like an egg and a queen.

Unfortunately one day a sibling got to know about something we did together (which can’t be disclosed here) and told my parents about it, that was the beginning of my problems. My parents insulted, disgraced and disrespected me anyhow when I visited them cos I was working in a different town.

I told the guy about their behavior and he called my parents to apologize. He even tried to see them to apologize but they didn’t want to see him. Since I was with my parents during that time, the pressure on me was hard for me to bear so I had to tell this guy it was over. It was not my inner desire but from the decision of my siblings I have to execute. It was very hard for this guy to accept the break up but he accepted and was very very hurt.

After I broke up with him, I knew I wouldn’t get someone like him but I said to myself I will manage any guy that comes my way. That was when I saw I had left an angel for demons and gold for stones, getting broken hearts left, right, center, back. Then the regrets came in. I saw I had to stand in for my ex when the problem happen because it involved the two of us but I betrayed him. I was the one with him and knew him more than my siblings did. I shouldn’t have traded my happiness for family decisions. I had to love myself and what I liked.

I shouldn’t have made my siblings make love decisions for me because I am the one going to live with the person not them. Now my ex is married and how he treats his wife makes me feel I have left perfume rice to eat tujimi. There were some days I saw them in town and wept bitterly when I got home. Am not married now, but I hope will get someone better or like him hmm.

I want every lady to know that when you get a good man don’t let him go away because good men are hard to find, and happiness is not something that can be bought so we should worship and adore people who give us one.
Not all decisions from our parents are right, love decisions must be taken by yourself, don’t involve anyone.

Nobody can take your pain, so don’t let anyone take your happiness.
Ladies if you quit on the process, you are quitting on the result. Thanks

About Wealth Femi

I am Wealth O. A, B.Sc (Chemistry), Delta State University, Nigeria, Diploma (Basic Marine certs), Regional Maritime University, Ghana. Married with kids. Marriage and Relationship Counselor, writer and entrepreneur.

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